Chapter 8: The Journey-hood to Motherhood: FB can suck

October 28, 2014

I really do love social media. I love how it can connect you to all types of people. I enjoy the wealth of information that you can learn via social media. It makes a really big world seem really small. However, social media can be the damn devil (excuse my french).

Last night as I was browsing my time line on FB, I saw that one of my friends was expecting. Now, I don't speak to this friend very often so there was no love loss in her not personally calling me. Which to be honest, I think a phone call would have been easier to handle. Don't ask me why. But that is what I believe. Any way, I congratulated her on soon to be new bundle of joy. Then after about an hour, there were other folks commenting on the picture. I cannot stand to see alerts on my phone, so I would open the notifications to see what others had to say.

Alas, that was the problem. I. Kept. Seeing. The. Darn. Picture.

Then, it finally hit me that I was supposed to be pregnant still. My baby was supposed to be due on November 18, 2014. Shoot, I was supposed to be pregnant still with baby number 2, that was due on June 6, 2015. But it was the first baby that shook me up. Well, because November 1st is on Saturday and my former due date is in less than 4 weeks away... It hurts... And if I can be honest... I was a little envious.

So I cried. I asked God when will it be my turn... Then I prayed and gave it back over to God. I am sure I will cry some more in the days to come. I am okay with that. I have given myself permission to feel these emotions as they come. However, I will NOT allow myself to stay in a negative state. But I must acknowledge them and then release them.

Thankfully, today is a better day. No tears so far. Just taking it one minute at a time...

P.S. Why do my Falcons suck so bad?! OMG! It is getting out of control! How are you up 21 points to 0, and then lose by one point?? It just breaks my heart! LOL! At least the Tide won on Saturday. :-)

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